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Khuddamul Ahmadiyya Canada

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DATING

By Nabil Mirza Sahib

By

All major world religions emphasize the importance of marriage. God Almighty is
described in the Holy Quran as Al-Hakeem, the Wise, which means that each of His
commandments is replete with profound wisdom. Not following Divine commandments
can result in detrimental consequences for individuals and the society at large.
Impact On Parents
Recently, a decrease in marriages has been observed and more than ever before,
children are being raised by single parents. This harmful trend is causing many societal
problems.
Over 9.5 million American families are run by single parents. Studies have shown that
single parents are more likely to have mental health issues, financial hardships, live in a
low-income area, and receive low levels of social support. All of these factors are taken
into consideration when evaluating the mental health of single parents. For example,
taking the case of single mothers, the occurrence of moderate to severe mental
disability was more pronounced among single mothers at 28.7% compared to partnered
mothers at 15.7%. These mental disabilities include but are not limited to anxiety and
depression. Financial hardships also affect the mental health of single mothers.
Women, ages 15- 24, were more likely to live in a low socio- economic area, have one
child, and not to have completed their senior year of high school.
Impact On Children
According to David Blankenhorn, Patrick Fagan, Mitch Pearlstein David Popenoe and
Barbara Dafoe Whitehead, living in a single parent family is strongly correlated with
school failure and problems of delinquency, drug use, teenage pregnancies, poverty,
and welfare dependency in the United States.
On the other side, married couples have better physical health, more financial stability,
greater social mobility, and their children experience higher academic performances,
emotional maturity and financial stability.
This is exactly why, in Islam, marriage is not an option but an obligation. The Holy
Quran says that you have been created from one soul and from it, your partner has also
been created (4:2). Hazrat Musleh Mau’ood (ra) explains while commenting on this
verse that in the beginning mankind was one and these two constituents, meaning the
male and the female completes that. He says: “For the moral, spiritual, mental and
physical completion and perfection, you need those two constituents to come together.”
Moreover, another harmful trend which is affecting our lives especially young married
couples is the dating culture.

The dating culture is basically to have fun with a person, to stay with them for some
time, but when things get difficult, to move away from them without trying to face or
resolve the issue. On the other hand, marriage is a commitment; it is a serious matter.
This is why The Holy Quran addresses the married women as المحصنات and married men
as المحصنین.
The Arabic word احصان someone in a fortress where there are external threats, but once
you’re inside, you will be protected from dangers.
Thus, marriage is a serious commitment that leads to peace in the society. The Holy
Quran says that marriage should be pursued solemnly and in the proper manner,
without committing any fornication (4:25):
مُّحۡصِنِیۡنَ غَیۡرَ مُسٰفِحِیۡنَ .

Families are the building blocks of civilization. Strong families build strong communities,
while family breakdown harms society and disturbs peace.

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